Compass

 

You are uniquely separate from generic or more broad terms like travel, because even though parts of you can attributed to travel-like experiences, certain characteristics are incomparable.

While anticipating you, I looked to you as an escape; I was literally putting miles and oceans between me and my doctors, schooling, and perceived expectations. I knew that at my new nomad university I could make my face value whatever I pleased.

Just days before leaving I realized I was running towards many things, not escaping them like I had previously thought. I was reaching for a blank slate, for the unseen, for the wanderers, and for the Riley who confidently knew she could take on the world. And what an experience that was.

Each block was completely different. In London I shared a room with a girl from ASU on the second floor of a giant complex with over one thousand rooms and briskly walked 26 minutes to class each day. In Paris I had my own room in an apartment with my French host mom and flat mate from Chicago and took the metro to my classes (which only took place twice a week). In Rome I shared an apartment with five other girls, each of us from a different state, and had class either in the city or at the nunnery across the street. {And then, to top it all off, I flew to Prague and Budapest, staying in Airbnb’s located in the very center of the cities to take in a few more moments of Europe}

I am sad that my time here has ended. But it would be disrespectful if this sadness became anything greater than a bitter-sweet feeling, as my time here was wonderful and one of a kind.

To look at the start of our relationship though I need to take a few steps back. Outside of my fascination with you and all the blogs I read by those who had already experienced you, we connected a handful of weeks before my departure over an online course. It was called ‘The Global Scholar,’ which just became an ongoing joke between us students, but the title is for reference sake and to note that it was not a class that transferred as actual credits.

We checked in and had various assignments about you throughout our time, but I was first sent a link to an ‘Intercultural Development Inventory’ survey that contained over 50 statements to which I responded by filling in one of five bubbles ranging from: strongly agree, agree, neither agree nor disagree, disagree, and strongly disagree.

Here are a few examples of what was included:

“I do not feel I have a culture”

“I feel rootless; I do not have a culture to identify with”

“People are the same; we have the same needs, interests, and goals in life”

“People of other cultures are more interested in improving themselves”

“I do not identify with any culture, but with what I have inside”

“Our culture should be a model for the rest of the world”

“It is impossible to mix cultures without conflict”

Unfortunately, I don’t have a copy of it with me right now so I am unable to include some of the less-harsh ones, but these are the ones that I took note of because they caught my attention.

Going into this I wasn’t sure if I had a culture. I felt as though I needed a traditional garb and a shared religious tie to belong to one. I was confused by the idea that people are the same because they are similar but to say “the same” is a stretch. And I might have disagreed slightly with the idea that conflict is inevitable when mixing cultures.

One week ago I was asked to take this same survey again.

Now I am confident that I have a culture, though it may be half specific to my personal life and what I see “inside” myself, it’s still a culture. And I don’t have just one culture I identify with, which I found to be a beautiful discovery!

I decided that people are the same in their humanity. We all have souls; we all have basic needs. But necessities concerning life and death are far different from preferences that are considered necessities depending on the culture. For instance, the value of time in America usually correlates with speeding up everything so we can use as much as possible, whereas Italians might just work fewer hours so they can have their time and use it for socializing, a necessity.

Mixing cultures always causes conflict, but conflict doesn’t have to be a bad thing! Conflict just means there is a difference in opinion, which can take place peacefully, not to mention that growth, understanding and new ideas are birthed from these opposites.

In hindsight, I might not be able to say l’arte d’arrangiarsi, the Italian equivalent of ‘making something out of nothing,’ or recall all the challenges I set out to tackle..

But through my journey with you I stumbled across far more than just preset goals. Plus, my journey isn’t a checklist. I visited 9 countries and took planes, trains, and busses but those are just some concrete or numerical parts of our time. They aren’t the substance. As Yvon Chouinard, the founder of Patagonia, said, “The best journeys answer questions that in the beginning you didn’t even think to ask.”

I don’t have words to explain the epiphanies, moments, or insights I had, but I can confidently back Chouinard’s wise words and do my best to list a few key things that were emphasized during my time overseas:

Time is truly of the essence

Plans are made to be changed

Dreams are meant to be challenged

There are multiple types of friendships; each possessing their own value in your life

Embrace the nights when you can’t fall asleep

Take every opportunity to laugh

Welcome your youth with open arms, taking in its freedom, for this level of independence will never be available again

Don’t buy into the lie machines, they’re just fancy facades

You don’t have to share it all, actually don’t because it should be given to an audience who values it, but also don’t miss the chance to say what’s on your heart

Find out what you truly value and form your daily life around it

Work for the things, people, beliefs you find worthwhile

Your life is incomparable to others, though still relatable

Hear the city, tune into the wild, listen to the people

Don’t be so mainstream; fund dreamers, fund families

Live without pretense, but not without wisdom

The best trips are the ones that age well, somehow becoming more funny, beautiful and valuable with each passing week, month, year!

 

I’m coming home now, 136 days later, with shorter hair, a really whacked Achilles, a wrist full of bracelets, and a new self, (or aspiring to-be-new self).

I left nearly 5 months ago, telling myself to be a blessing, be present, be mindful and change.

The process of change is a never ending one, so I guess I’m still enrolled in that course. But as far as statistical change goes I’ve most certainly done some remodeling because of you. And even still, I am also coming home to lots of change. A new house, new friends, a new reality, a new life as a college student, new roommates, the whole works! But time often leaves room for change and while I was away life went on. It can be somewhat hard to keep up with..

I laughed, I cried, I slept in, I didn’t sleep, I got lost, I knew where I was going, I held my pee, I was forced to take to the streets. I have ticket stubs, bottle caps, letters, photos and videos. And I have my brain and the things it alone can recall. But even with all of that I can’t physically take you home with me, especially not with the weight limit on my luggage. But, as a friend told me, you weren’t just about “seeing new things,” but about seeing things with new eyes. So I’ll take my new eyes, and as many friendships, smiles and memorable moments home with me.

Be present, try on as many eyes as possible, turn the jams up, be silly, and enjoy your culture.

Toodles noodles. That was one heck of a ride.

 

On to the next now, right? I’m not even sure what “next” is yet, but I’ll do my best to remain and pursue a moving target.

 

Riley Makenna

 

~

My brain may wilt

My memory may fade

But my soul holds all,

And will remain

~